Talking to Your Kids About the Newtown Shooting

Today is the first school day following the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, CT, where 20 children and six adults were killed by a gunman.

While with their peers, many kids may hear about the news, or learn additional details.

Here is advice from experts about how to discuss the news with your children this evening. The advice is compiled from the American Psychological Association, Massachusetts General Hospital, the City and Country School in Manhattan and the New York Times:

• Choose a time to talk when kids are the most receptive, such as while riding in a car, before dinner or at bedtime.
• Feel your children out so you can figure out what information they have. Encourage them to discuss the issue and don’t interrupt.
• Give them the facts in the simplest way possible. The younger the child, the simpler the facts.
• If your children are scared, try to pinpoint the exact source. A good approach is to ask them what their worst fears are and address those. Make sure to validate their feelings.
• Try to convey the following points to them: that this is a rare event, that the adults in their lives are doing everything they can to keep them safe and that you are there for them.
• Spend extra time with your children and hug them often. Keep family routines and holiday traditions consistent.
• For children 12 and younger, limit television coverage of the shooting and only let them watch it in the presence of an adult. 
• If you have teenagers, try to get them to watch television news coverage with you and discuss it. Share your own feelings with them honestly and encourage them to talk about their own feelings and how they can deal with them. 

Share your own advice in the comments.