5 Things You Need to Know Today: Q-Train Late-Night Horror Continues, Cheap Date Comedy, More

1. You need a good laugh. Head to Union Hall for . This month Kristen Schaal (Flight of the Conchords, Daily Show) , Chelsey Calloway (Comedy as a Second Language), Neal Statsny (ECNJ "Best Comedy Event" nominee) and Josh Carter (New York Underground Comedy Festival) perform, while Tyler Fischer ('LMAO' Improv) and Sharron Paul (College Humor) host. Union Hall, 702 Union St. (at 5th Avenue), 7:30 p.m. $5. 

2. You need to make good on your resolution to reduce your carbon footprint. You can start with your cleaning products. Tonight Brooklyn Launchpad is having the lecture: , where you will learn how to make cleaning an intregal part of your life and also how to mix your own green cleaning products. . 6:30 to 7:30 p.m. Free.

3. You need to get your teens to the library. If they didn't go for yesterday's , today's offering, hanging out and , might go over better. Tell them they can bring their favorite movies, DVDs, and videogames and watch/play them in the library's television room with other teens.

4. You need to get the kids out of the house. Head to Park Slope for a  with Lloyd Miller. , 10-10:30 a.m., $3 per group. Or see our full list of kids events .

5. You need to know if your train is running. For Q-train riders, it's better than it was over the weekend, but from midnight to 5 a.m., all week, they're doing that awful thing where you have to switch Q trains from the N platform to the Q platform and then trains only run every 30 minutes, according to the MTA website (which has a schedule of train departures.) My advice: walk or take the 2 or 4 to and from Atlantic if you can. Note that the  continues March 12-13 and 19-20. Alternate side is in effect today, but it's suspended tomorrow for Ash Wednesday, according to the NYC DOT.