1. Hit the bars. For an evening out in the neighborhood there's Tuesday Nite Comedy at Eve's, Trivia Tuesday at Bar Sepia or Tammy Wynette's Bingo at Branded Saloon.
2. Hear some music. For something lower key, head to The Way Station to hear Lewis Lazar followed by Rebekah Todd. 683 Washington Ave. bet. St. Marks and Prospect in Prospect Heights. 9 p.m. No cover.
3. Make some music. If you're a singer looking for a challenge, head to the Brooklyn Philharmonia Chorus Audition today at 6:30 p.m. 124 Henry St. More info at the link.
3.5 Awww or Ewww? An important question for you: Are these newborn baby squirrels, seen in a box outside of Sean Casey Animal Rescue, cute or just plain creepy? Cast your vote! (Couldn't resist including this ...)
4. Invent a friend. Is your significant other nothing more than a figment of your troubled mind? Join the Brooklyn Cyclones on June 21 for Fictitious Friday, inspired by Manti Te'o's relationship with his fake girlfriend, Lennay Kekua. The promotion, which may or may not be fictional itself, invites ticket-holders to "bring their make believe significant-other to the ballpark free of charge." Tickets won't go on sale until spring, leaving you plenty of time to brush up on your pick-up tweets.
5. Move the car. Sorry, alternate side parking is indeed in effect today.